Lessons Learned: April/ May 2022 Edition

A few weeks ago, on April 9, I was painting my new office space when I fell and broke my elbow. Having never broken a bone, this was a whole new experience of pain that I would love to never feel again. Since then, I've been recovering slowly and thinking a lot about how I got here.

Stress, anxiety, and ultimately, burnout. With a healthy dose of clumsiness thrown in, of course. Your mileage may vary when it comes to overwork, but I'd guess there are a fair few of us out here teetering on the edge of burnout. Like me, you may not be aware of it until it's too late.

I don't think we put enough emphasis on the importance of resting. It feels lazy, or guilt sets in because of all that's still on the to-do list. Often we're so in the habit of constantly doing, that resting feels foreign and a little uncomfortable. Or, we just don't feel like we can.

At the height of feeling like I didn't have time to slow down, my body stepped in and changed all of that. I got an unintended month-long hiatus, during which I could not lift anything heavier than my phone with my left hand. I couldn't open jars, do my hair, wash dishes, and everything from getting dressed to getting into the car took an agonizingly long time. I spent a few days wallowing in the knowledge that I had a lot to do, but for the moment, I was grounded.

Healing time is slow time. There's a lot that can be done to support the body while it mends, but nothing can really speed the process. So, I sat with what I was feeling. I thought about how long I'd been feeling anxious or rushed or inadequate. I thought about how that affected my work and my personal life. I meditated to slow my breathing down. I started to let go - just a little - of the need to be "doing everything right," and I decided that the only thing I needed to do right in this time, was heal. I got myself grounded in a much healthier way.

Now with the office relocation coming up, I am trying to be deliberate with my movements. I'm going to ease my way back into working because I still don't have my strength or full range of motion back, but I'm getting there. I'm going to ask for help when I need it, because even if I can handle things by myself, I don't always need to. And I'm going to rest. Because rest is how we become stronger, and goodness, it's taken me a very long time to finally admit that.